3 Heads & a Tail Page 3

  At the opposite end of the landing, Ben's door opened and he popped his ruffled head out, followed by Glen, who poked his own head out between his owner's legs. “What was all that about?”

  “Erm, I woke her up,” said David, a bit stunned.

  “I don't think she was impressed!” replied Ben, shaking his head. “Maybe get some headphones!”

  “That's what she said!” David was still amazed at the way Josie had spoken to him. He was used to getting his own way with women. Butter wouldn't melt in his mouth, his mother used to say.

  “See you later, I'm mashed!” mumbled Ben, disappearing back into his room.

  Chapter 6

  The following week was pretty uneventful. Josie was working late hours, rushing to get the latest edition of Nature's Way out before the Friday deadline. She was so tired every evening that she was grabbing a bowl of cereal, taking it to her room, and collapsing asleep within half an hour. The house was quiet, except for the faint murmur of Ben's bluesy music and the odd woof from the furry one. All passed peacefully until it was once again the start of the welcome weekend.

  On the Friday night, Josie found herself dreading going to bed, afraid of being woken by Mr Bass Killer. She had managed to avoid him all week, but knew she was going to have to speak to him sooner or later. If he woke her in the morning she might actually brain him with his own guitar, or at least shove his perfect head up his perfect ass. She fell into a deep sleep with a big grin on her face at the thought.

  The next morning, Josie woke refreshed, but surprised. Light streamed through the curtains, birds tweeted outside her window and besides that she could hear nothing. No bass, no stomping. Lovely! Smiling, she flicked her feet out of the duvet, slipped on her slippers and robe, and collected her bath things. No sooner had she opened her door than David's head appeared from the hatch to his room. She jumped, a bit surprised. Had he been listening for the sound of her door?

  “Hi,” he said, a little less confidently than usual, but still doing the flicking hair thing. “Did you sleep well?”

  Josie, embarrassed, hugged her things closer to her chest. “Yes, I did.”

  “Good,” smiled David. “I was a bit worried after what you said. I decided to take your advice and use headphones. I didn't want to totally piss off my new housemate!”

  Josie looked down at her feet, encased in fluffy purple slippers. Not so cool. “That's fine,” she said. “Don't worry about it. I'm sorry if I was snappy, but I get really crabby if I don't get my sleep. I'm like a bear with a bad head!”

  “I'm happy everything is good. I thought you might be avoiding me!”

  “Me? No,” she lied, suspecting he wasn't used to being avoided by the female sex. “I'm just going to shower.”

  “Cool, but would you let me buy you a coffee afterwards to say sorry and start afresh?”

  Josie hadn't expected that and felt put on the spot. “Alright,” she blurted out, before she could stop herself.

  “Cool!” said David, disappearing back into his hatch.

  Shit, shit, shit, she thought, bumbling across the landing to the bathroom. She locked the door and sat down on the edge of the bath. Why had she said yes? She'd rather go for coffee with Glen! At least that would be an enjoyable experience and they might actually have something in common! She had a funny feeling that coffee with David would involve just talking about his favourite topic – David! Ugh! She breathed a deep sigh and started to run a bath. She needed a very long soak.

  Chapter 7

  The place David chose was a small coffeehouse in the park, surrounded by trees. The interior was old-fashioned, with wooden beams everywhere, and antique-looking lamps sat on small, round, wooden tables. The windows were old and criss-crossed in panels. Josie got the impression that it had been there quite a while and was a family business. While David went to order some drinks, she sat down in the corner and looked around. She had to admit that he had made a good choice for coffee. He returned to the table carrying a steaming mocha for her and a latte for himself, along with a handful of wrapped, fruit-filled biscuits.

  “I thought you might be peckish,” he said, as she looked at the small, sweet pyramid.

  Josie took one of the biscuits thoughtfully. Unwrapping it, she felt strangely nervous for no reason in particular.

  David looked directly at her. “So, now I've got you alone…”

  She trembled at the thought.

  “I want to apologise for waking you up – twice – and start over. I'm not the selfish git that you probably think I am,” announced David, playing with his spoon between finger and thumb.

  Josie smiled. “Apology accepted, but you already apologised.”

  “Oh,” mumbled David. “Right. Cool.”

  She tried to sip her coffee to avoid filling the following silence, but it was too hot. She spluttered it. “Oops, it's hotter than I was expecting!”

  David grinned. “That's because it came from a hot place!”

  She imagined he did too, but she wasn't going to be fazed by his eerily good looks. Perhaps he had a deep, dark secret and an ugly painting hidden up there in the attic.

  “They always have good coffee here,” said David. “It's so much better than those stuck-up places. Good old-fashioned coffee!”

  Josie raised her eyebrows. That wasn't something she expected him to say. He was kind of plastic looking, so she expected him to like plastic places. She had always preferred things that were imperfect. Perfection made her nervous.

  “What made you move to Parkside?” asked David, looking intently at her. Her lack of enthusiasm for his company intrigued him.

  “I needed somewhere to live, and it's close to work and where Kay lives,” she replied, thoughtfully. “The street is really green and leafy. I hate grey places. And then there's the park.”

  “So you're a bit of a hippie is what you're telling me? You like nature and stuff?”

  “Yep,” said Josie. “I even work on magazines about animals. I'm happiest out of doors… unless I'm sleeping.”

  “Because you love your sleep so much and would kill if disturbed!” laughed David.

  “Well, you almost found out! If you had woken me one more time I wouldn't have been responsible for my actions!”

  David took a sip of his coffee. He wasn't sure if she was joking or not and that made the conversation really interesting. So different from the women he was accustomed to, she was a challenge.

  “Exactly how long have you been playing guitar?” asked Josie.

  David looked up, his eyes brightening. At last, she was showing a bit of interest in him. “A long, long time! I'm in a band.”

  Josie nibbled on a biscuit, trying to think of something to say. “Is it a successful band?”

  I dream of stardom!” he grinned. “But the highest I've got is playing in the local pub!”

  “Well you have to start somewhere. Do you enjoy it?”

  “Yeah, loads,” he replied. “It's my passion. I can't imagine doing anything else. I live and breathe music. I know that sounds cheesy.”

  “Yeah, it does, but I get it. Did you ever consider a regular career?”

  David grinned. “You mean like an estate agent? No way. I wouldn't be able to sit still. I'd get so bored and you have to wear a suit. That's so not me. I'd feel squeezed in a suit. I wouldn't be able to breathe. I'd look a tosser!”

  Josie giggled, spluttering her coffee. Perhaps Mr Perfect was actually more human than plastic. “I hate wearing suits too. In a suit and high heels I'd feel like a transvestite!”

  “Well, cheers to that,” laughed David, raising his coffee. They clinked mugs and drank.

  Chapter 8

  “What say you we get out of here and take a walk?” he suggested, glancing out the window. Outside, the sun was blazing. Some children were running around, and a couple of dogs were barking and chasing something.

  Josie, despite herself, nodded.

  Smiling, David got up, gathering the two mugs. “I'l
l just go and pay the bill.”

  That was nice of him, she thought, considerate. She looked down at her hands. She wasn't sure what to make of him. This was not a date, but what if he believed it was? Josie rolled her eyes at the thought – the guy looked like a supermodel! But what would it be like to date one? She imagined a private plane, red carpets, lights, cameras, action...

  “Let's go!”

  Josie landed back on Earth and followed David to the door, which he patiently held open for her – another good sign. She mumbled a thank you as they wandered out into the sun. She squinted. It was bright and warm. A rush of flower and tree scents greeted her.

  “These are my favourite trees – silver birches,” observed David as they strode along.

  “Mine too,” she said, adding “really” when he looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “They are my favourites because they are so unusual in colour. There are no other trees quite like them.”

  “I like willows, too.”

  “No way!” said Josie, “they're my second favourite. We've always called them Weeping Willows since I was a kid. We used to run under them 'cos they dangle so. We'd stand in the middle underneath them and it would feel like we were in a tent – a tent that smelt of green.”

  “Sounds wonderful,” said David, digging his hands into his jean pockets.

  Josie wondered how there was any space for his hands, seeing as those jeans looked sprayed on. She forced her attention to divert to a dog chasing a stick. Wow, he can move, she thought. The dog that is!

  “Well, in an attempt to get to know you, and hopefully not sound too cheesy, what's your favourite colour?” asked David after a few minutes of silence.

  They were walking alongside the lake. A few boats bobbed about in the middle, their amateur rowers struggling to go straight.

  “I could be predictable and say blue, but it's actually purple, deep purple – as dark as you can get it,” replied Josie. “What's yours?”

  “Black.”

  “That's not a colour!” said Josie. “That's a non-colour, a colour without colour!”

  “Actually,” protested David, “it's a combination of all the colours. I know this because I had a friend who was studying colour – yeah, yeah, really! And black is all of the colours mixed up. White is actually no colour at all. It reflects them all.”

  “I didn't know that.”

  “Ah, so I'm teaching you something!” He grinned. “What's your favourite animal?”

  “I don't need to think hard about that one – eagle.”

  “Why?”

  “Because they can fly and they're so powerful! They can just soar across the skies, unbothered by anything – pure freedom!” smiled Josie. “If only...”

  “So you're an escapist?”

  Josie laughed. “Sometimes, not always; depends on the situation. But yeah, there have been times when I just wanted to fly away as high as possible and then take my time coming back.”

  “I get it.”

  “Don't get me wrong though, I'm not a pessimist,” she said. “At other times I might just wanna fly for the sheer hell of it. You know, you could fly off on holiday without having to pay some big plane ticket, remember your passport and pack your luggage!”

  “True.”

  “What about you?”

  “Me?” asked David, flicking his hair out of his dark eyes. “I'd be a lion, the king of the jungle!”

  “Ha! I could've guessed that one!” Josie giggled.

  “Why?”

  “Well, you know, the lion wants to be the king... rule everyone, stand out, be the centre of attention,” she teased.

  “So you're saying I want everyone to look at me?!”

  She laughed. “Yes!”

  “Well, that's not very nice!” David clutched his heart and pretended to be hurt. “And there was me thinking we were getting along nicely.”

  “I'm just kidding, but King of the Jungle? You're asking for it by saying that!”

  “You'd rather I said a penguin or something?”

  Josie nodded.

  “Okay, I'm Pingu – King Pingu of the Pengies. Happy now?”

  She couldn't stop laughing. The idea of David as a flappy penguin, waddling down an ice-covered beach was too much. A penguin in sprayed-on jeans, flicking his beak! Trippy!

  “Look! Your favourite – a weeping willow,” said David, pointing to the tree yonder and quickening his pace towards it.

  Josie looked up and followed after him. David had already walked beneath the willow's leaves, which hung low to the ground. She parted them like a doorway, letting them drop behind her. It was like standing in a green room. The earthy smell of the tree filled her senses. All around them the leaves hung down like fingers – a green chandelier.

  “It's beautiful,” said David, looking straight at her.

  “It is,” she agreed, trying not to meet his gaze, which seemed ardent.

  “Like you,” he said, and in a moment he was kissing her.

  She hadn't even noticed him move. One minute he was standing over there, and the next his lips were on hers. And what a kiss! She sank into it as if in a dream. It didn't seem real. If someone had told her yesterday that she'd be standing under a tree kissing Mr Tight Pants, she'd have died laughing, but here she was doing just that. She couldn't fight the attraction. The guy was perfect looking, even if his personality wasn't. Minutes passed by and she wasn't sure how many.

  “Josie,” he said, after an endless time, “I'm sorry, but I couldn't help myself!”

  “Don't apologise on my account,” she said, tidying her hair. “Did you see me fighting you off?”

  “So you don't mind if I do it again?” he asked, with a faint smirk on his face.

  “Nope, you'll get no complaints from me.”

  Glen

  Josie and Poser Face just came home. I can't voofing believe it. Is she mad? Has she no eyes? Can't she see that he's an idiot? They walk in, hugging, and he's kissing her, and she's hugging him back. What's going on? Did the Earth tilt? It's not fair. Ben's going to be upset. I just know it. Except he won't show he's upset because he's too nice. Not like Mr Big Ass – big ass, big head, small brain. I'm surprised at Josie. Ah here he comes. If he thinks he's touching me, he's got another thought coming. Get away from me!

  “Voof, voof, voof.” Yep that's it. Got the message? Back off! I like Ben, I don't like you. “Voof, voof.”

  It's not over yet, Mr Tight Pants. May the best man win – and the best dog. ASSHOLE.

  Chapter 9

  “So, let me get this straight. You kissed Mr Model?” gasped Kay, her eyes wide.

  “Yes,” replied Josie, putting down her pint. “And you know what? It was good!”

  “No!” screeched Kay. “I thought you couldn't stand him!”

  “Well, I couldn't, but then he apologised for waking me up and asked me to go for a coffee.”

  “And you went?”

  Josie pulled a face. “I didn't mean to, but I said yes before I could think straight. I didn't want to go, but then it was nice. I thought he'd be arrogant and full of himself, but he was the opposite and funny.”

  “Funny?”

  “Yeah! Funny! Stop laughing! He's a very good kisser. He just grabbed me like in a movie. It was exciting. He's not my type, but it just happened. No big deal.”

  Kay giggled. “It's like that song, It's in his kiss!”

  “Okay, now I'm shutting up! It was just a crazy moment! It's not going to happen again. You're just jealous!”

  Josie took another swig of her pint and looked around. She liked this pub. It did really good ale. This one tasted like honey and stayed on the tongue. Just like the memory of something else, she thought, grinning to herself.

  Kay nudged her arm. “Too right, I'm jealous! I wish I'd seen it!” She twisted the straw of her cocktail in her hand – a Pina Colada with a big umbrella and a huge slice of pineapple. Josie knew she would get at least one of those three items stuck up her nose if she'd tried t
o drink that. “So, did you sleep with him?”

  “No, of course not, I only kissed the guy. I'm not a fast car in the fast lane like you! And he's not boyfriend material.”

  “Okay, but he might be fling material! If he kisses as good as you say, imagine what he's like in the sack. And that butt – my god, what I'd do to see that out of those jeans. I think the memory would keep me going through the driest desert!”

  “Stop!” laughed Josie. “Now you're putting evil thoughts in my head and I'm going to be stealing your ice cubes!”

  “I think I need one!” giggled Kay, flicking one down her top. It didn't get too far, but sort of nestled in her cleavage, which was ceremoniously pushed up by her pink Wonderbra. The heads of the three young guys seated at the nearest table swivelled round, their eyes popping out on stalks.

  “I think you have an audience!” nudged Josie.

  “I think you're right!” Kay grinned. “The middle one is a bit of alright! What do you reckon?”

  Josie's face fell, “Oh, no!”

  “They might be fun,” teased Kay, pouting.

  “But we're having fun. We don't need guys. Can't we just have a nice night by ourselves?”

  “Oh, come on!” said Kay, turning and winking at the guy in the middle. Scooping up their drinks in one easy action, they were over in a flash.

  “Mind if we join you, girls?” asked the tallest, with ginger hair, freckles and laughing brown eyes.

  “If you don't mind, that is,” added the middle and best-looking one, with blonde hair and blue eyes.

  The third one just smiled. He had brown, messy hair and deep brown eyes. Probably the shyest, thought Josie, as he kind of hid behind his pint. It looked like ale. She approved.

  “Sure, why not?” grinned Kay, sipping her drink seductively through a straw. She flicked the end with her tongue. The guy in the middle nearly wobbled. “Pull up some chairs, boys!”

  The three guys did as they were told. The middle one sat next to Kay, so close that his thigh was touching hers. She didn't look disappointed. The ginger one sat alongside Josie and the shy one sat in the middle of the two guys, facing the girls. He sort of hugged his pint of ale, which languished on the beer-stained table in front of him.